Don’t let those fluffy Easter Bunny videos fool you…
Bunnies are NOT cute and cuddly creatures. They’re evil. Pure evil, we tell ya!
Hey, don’t roll your eyes.
We’re not adults with a ridiculous rabbit phobia who were once traumatized kids — all because we pulled a stupid bunny’s tail when we were 7 and got bitten! We’ve got FACTS. Facts, we tell ya! LOL…
1) They make kids cry!
We all know children have a sixth sense. If you’re ugly, they’ll tell you. If someone stinks, they’ll scream — “Ew, he stinks!” Kids speaketh the truth! And that’s exactly why they cry when parents make them hop on bad bunny’s lap every year for the dreaded Easter picture. They sense the evil!
2) They f#@$ like rabbits!
Put your pecker away, Peter Cottontail. Have you no sense of decency?! Rabbits get busy anywhere and everywhere & hump ANYTHING. We get it, your sex drive is through the roof. Okay!
3) Rabbit’s tail = bad luck
4) Red eyes = evil!
We thought eating carrots give you better vision and clearer eyes. So, why the hell are their eyes red when your car headlights shine on them at night?!?! Things that make you go hmmmmmm… EVIL!
5) Have you not seen Monty Python and the Holy Grail?!
See! Killer rabbit in the flesh taking a bite outta flesh!
6) They steal cookies from cute babies
7) And… they play tricks on cute little old men
Elmer Fudd is the true hero. He knew that darn Bugs Bunny was up to no good, out spreading evil… so he had to get him!
Come on, silly rabbit, respect your elders. Tricks are for kids!