DALLAS -- What a stinky situation!
Former NBA player and Dallas Maverick, Charlie Villanueva, took to Twitter Tuesday night because he was robbed!
Sure, they got away with somewhat normal stuff like his appliances, but more importantly, they took his toilet! Okay, so according to Dallas Police it happened at a property he's flipping to resell, but still!
We've got some ideas. It could be the world's most famous plumbers, Mario and Luigi.
Or in this holiday season, we can't forget the Wet Bandits, famous for their thieving hi-jinks in Home Alone. On second thought, that's probably not it. This potty pilferer was at least nice enough not to leave the water running.
"Several weeks ago, the Northeast Division discovered a spike in residential burglaries in which the houses were under construction or vacant."
But maybe it's something else!
"I think it might have been the S******** Geister," said Pou-Pourri Vice President of Marketing Will Clarke.
(For those who don't know, that censored word is slang for 'poop' in German)
"He lives in the bathroom and creates mischief," Clarke continued. "He's the poo ghost of Christmas past."
Poo ghost or not, the fine people at Poo-Pourri make a habit of getting into people's defecation dilemmas. The masters of the BM are dropping into Charlie's DMs!
"A year's worth supply of Poo-Pourri," said Public Relations Director Rebekah Riley. "We don't want him to have to deal with this stinky situation anymore."
"One in three people don't have toilets in the world, and unfortunately Charlie's now one of them, and we want to help him out," Clarke continued.
They're obviously number one when it comes to number two, but will Villanueva take them up on the offer? So far, he's only responded with the "chin rubbing" emoji.
Oh! And speaking of number two, he's wanted for questioning.